Even Hell's fury shouldn't be this bad
- Put up a huge billboard next to Steven's office telling everyone what a lying, cheatin, scumbag he is. Pay for the billboard using Steven's money.
- Hand out the entire wine collection that Steven has built over the years to hard-working landscapers in the neighbourhood.
- Hand out flyers saying Lost Dog, with Steven's photo, all over NYC.
- Waive A-Rod and Pujols off the fantasy baseball team and signed up players from the disabled list. Ouch!
- Kill Steven's 38-year old teddy bear in Reservoir Dog fashion.
- Pawn the engagement ring and get clothes, Pilates sessions, male masseuse and a 40" flat screen TV.
- Take the entire porn collection and send it across to the parents with a note, "Am storing this for a while. Feel free to watch at leisure." No, wait. Add a naked Polaroid of Steven tied to four bedposts.
Update: There's no truth in this world. (Hat-tip: Sashi)